:(

May. 14th, 2011 01:43 pm
rocknload: (PINE ☌ bright smiles sunny days)
I THOUGHT I WOULD JUST UPDATE TO SAY THAT I don't really use this journal anymore! :( I might post fanfiction here since that is where all the rest of my fic is, but otherwise ... I mostly update at [personal profile] highways now. I MAY USE THIS IN THE FUTURE IDK and I still log in like once a week to check my flist. (Even though the site sort of confuses me lately.)
rocknload: (SHINee ☌ replay replay.)
Oh, man, I am on fire today. Today I have accomplished the following: got up at six to study, made it to my intensive Chinese course at nine, got out at twelve and then accidentally passed out for two hours then got up and made it to my university Chinese class only slightly late! if an hour and a half counts as slightly Then I paid my electric bill! I paid my phone bill! I sent a donation off to Doctors WIthout Borders! I took my garbage out! I did my laundry! And once that's dry and put away I'm going to meet my friends in a lab they clear out every night to practice a traditional Thai dance.

I even hand washed some clothes. My back keeps violently thanking me for that.

Whenever anybody acts amazed at my language skills I feel like such a poser. My friends here have been doing that lately. For one, they're just doing it to be polite. For two, they're wrong. "Brittany speaks English, Chinese, Spanish, French, German, and Japanese!" Ha, uh, sure, I guess, if "speaks" here means "took some in college." In that case, you forgot sign language! Esperanto should probably also count.

I might be graduating in a semester and I'll know for sure if I can ever get anybody at my school to remember that I exist. My odds aren't good, though. Usually I have to show up in person to manage that. I don't know why, maybe they just really want proof. But then I'm free, man, I will be so free. Free and awesome. Do not worry, I am well aware of the fact that I am much more likely to get a job with my experience waiting tables than with my undergrad degree in linguistics. I suffer from no delusions.
rocknload: (SHINee ☌ no.)
I have logged into my LJ for the first times in ages. Well, not exactly. I logged in a few days ago but I was sure I typed my password in wrong but then LJ LET ME IN ANYWAY??? So I was sort of creeped by that and sort of left without checking anything. Not to be all paranoid, but.

I live in Taiwan, my life sucks and that's all old news. It's the third week of classes but they just really started in earnest, so naturally I have missed two of them so far this week. One of my classes is about gangster movies so I am actually watching the Godfather for the first time in my life. So many people are dying! It's crazy. Starting next week I also start three hours a day, five days a week hardcore Chinese school, which is awesome because my Chinese totally, totally sucks.

Like, seriously.

And I am angry about politics but that is also normal! Arizona basically wants to secede from the federal government or just opt out of obeying any of its laws while still getting federal benefits or I don't know, it sucks. It really sucks. Our governor is like Sarah Palin if Sarah Palin was a sociopath willing to let people die in order to gain political power; our state legislature is literally run by the Tea Party. It is like a nightmare that never ends.

Nothing interesting is happening to me.
rocknload: (飛輪海 ☌ 我也想還你 一樣的感動)
I AM GOING BACK TO AMERICA for three weeks anyway I THOUGHT I SHOULD LET PEOPLE KNOW

okay back to watching kpop vids and writing twdrama fanfiction MY LIFE IT HAS CHANGED SO MUCH
rocknload: (終極一家 ☌ 這是我的時代)
Since I have finals this week I've decided to do the sensible thing and put together an epic pic spam of my new favorite television show, Zhong Ji Yi Jia, and MOST IMPORTANTLY MY FAVORITE CHARACTER: THAT BRIGHT RAY OF SUNSHINE AND HAPPINESS, XIA YU. )

So, as you see, this is the cutest television show in the universe. Taiwan has been holding out on us, man. If I'd've known such adorable crack existed in television form I would've learned Chinese ages ago.
rocknload: (飛輪海 ☌ 我也想還你 一樣的感動)
My final Chinese presentation was a disaster in which none of my Powerpoint worked right, and I ended up spending the entire thing literally leaping in front of a map of the United States that was projected a few feet above my head, pointing at individual states and trying to describe them in vague and messed up Mandarin. On the other hand, when asked what I did for New Years, I rattled off the names of the performers I saw at the Taipei 101—張惠美, 楊承琳, and 五月天—without any trouble at all. But I think that says more about my interests than like, any skill. 五月天's English name is Mayday, and if you're anything like me you'll squint at that for a second and then you'll be like, "... Oh. Hilarious." But I think they're well on their way to becoming like, one of my favorite bands. They're freaking amazing omg.

After the concert downtown Taipei was like a disaster scene with mobs of people all over the place, cops everywhere trying to do crowd control, all the convenience stores were looted, and after two hours of trying to escape I ended up sleeping in a bus station. That's how you know you partied hard, man.

It's already the third and I literally haven't done anything for the entire New Year. I have lost three days. Actually I'm like super depressed but I'm not sure why, maybe it's because my Chinese night school ends this week and then I will have no reason to live? But whatever man, I need to get off my ass and finish up my shit for my classes. Finals are next week and I need to get my shit together because I am vacationing in Americaland for the winter holiday.

I can tell when I'm stressed out because I get the urge to snap, "你看什麼看?!" at every Taiwanese person who gives me a double take. It's basically Mandarin for, "What are you looking at?" Well, fuck, who knows what it means. I barely speak Chinese, remember.
rocknload: (終極一家 ☌ 這是我的時代)

Seriously. How did I live without Mandopop. I can't believe I've only been listening to it for like what, three months? I wish I could say that the whole rap hands/kung fu combo they've got going on in this video is like, common, but no I think this might be a Jay Chou exclusive. I'm probably going to be tracking down every album this guy has ever released over the weekend. I am sorry I ignored you for so long, Jay Chou. I've known you existed for years but I didn't realize you were awesome. (Also, I, uh, used to think you were Chinese. Sorry about that!)

Like I said on Plurk, tomorrow night I'm attending basically the biggest New Years party on the island—me and some friends are going up to Taipei and checking out the shows and fireworks at Taipei 101. We're also staying there all night with no place to go or sleep, until we drag our sorry asses back to Taichung, where we're presumably sleep all freaking day Saturday. It should be epic fun or like a complete disaster. I mean it's a really stupid plan so disaster is totally possible, but I believe.

If I don't sleep through poetry tomorrow, then I totally made it to ever class this week! Even the ones I teach! I am amazing at meeting very basic goals, let me tell you.
rocknload: (飛輪海 ☌ 大東跟亞綸)
Okay now that I'm done with the series I'm going to talk about KO One. BUT FIRST, A CLIP OF HOW AMAZING IT IS.

<


I love this show and everybody else should too.

PARTY TIME 就是 NOW )

Looooooove.

Anyway I'm having like an emo day man. Everyday is an emo day. Also I can't decide if it's better to get yelled at in Chinese I don't understand or Chinese I do understand. I guess it's a good sign that the second thing is what happens more and more often, but man! Stop yelling at me! 拜託你,不要再罵我好不好。 I can't make my listening comprehension get better by magic and lecturing me about it isn't going to help goddamn.

Also now I have no American friends here and now I have no Internet connection in my dorm, prepare for my English to get far worse than it is already since I get virtually zero exposure to the language anymore. Sob. Sooooob.
rocknload: (愛就宅一起 ☌ 我不要)
Okay, since I'm trapped in my dorm room until I finish these translations for night school tonight, and also because I just finished an entire television show without English subtitles—go me! go me! I AM AWESOME.—I have decided to recap said drama. If I say anything about the show that is wrong, keep in mind how it was in Chinese, and I don't speak Chinese.



spoilers within IDK IF ANYBODY CARES BUT )

Okay back to translations, ugh.
rocknload: (DORADO ☌ cunning and wile)
I totally forgot about Thanksgiving until a few minutes ago and perhaps it would've been better that way, since I am stuck alone in my room with some violent six hour stomach thing—which has mostly passed, so now I'm starving but still feeling too ... too something, I don't know how to say it, too [FLAILY ARM GESTURES] to go get food plus I'm not super eager to grab something from a street stall at the moment. Also I'm pissed about missing two Chinese lessons tonight, plus I had to call into work, which was fun because nobody there really speaks English. They basically thought I was canceling for fun even though I kept trying to work the word sick into every slow, redundant sentence, until I finally thought fuck it and switched to Chinese and then they were like, "Oh~, you're sick!"

This is not even close to the worst Thanksgiving ever, though. I spent the worst Thanksgiving ever working twelve hours in the sun in Needles, California, so sick that I was probably hallucinating—I stumbled randomly around the job site, I couldn't figure out if ant hills gave their workers national holidays, I threw up repeatedly into garbage cans and the ground and into my own hair. When I finally got home I'm surprised that my family even let me in, considering I was coated in dirt, I hadn't showered in days, I was babbling incoherently about how only by dying could I be freed from this horrible agony, oh and I was covered in vomit. Somebody threw me into the shower and when I got out of it I spent the next several hours lying flat on my back on the ground and concentrated very hard on continuing to live, even though I still wasn't convinced that was actually the best course of action.

I TOLD YOU THAT STORY (AGAIN) IN ORDER TO SPREAD HOLIDAY CHEER.

I FEEL CHEERED UP, ANYWAY.


HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!
rocknload: (rrrraaaaaaaaugh)

I am very sick, and, since it is completely socially acceptable and even common here to walk around with a mask covering half your face like a freaking bandit, this is how I protect the neighborhood from my plague disease. I don't actually get the impression that a lot of people are bothered by my constant hacking cough, which maybe has a bit to do with how I got sick in the first place, but I care, okay.

I sort of have stuff to say about Taiwanese beauty standards, but I don't know how appropriate it would be for me to talk too much about them—I think they are messing with me, though. This is like the most insecure I've felt about how I look in years, and I'm mostly bugged by my face, which is something I've been okay with for most of my life! It doesn't help that people here take ten thousand pictures of everybody, thereby forcing me to confront my hideous visage on a nearly daily basis. I HATE IT MORE EVERY TIME I SEE IT MAN.

I'm trying to get into yet another Mandarin class. Unlike all my other lessons, this instructor is way more like what America taught me to expect out of Chinese teachers! By which I mean she hates me inexplicably and hates the way I talk even more. She'll let me know on Wednesday if I am worthy of level four.

My iPod randomly started playing this song. Why do I have it? What is my iPod trying to tell me.

Edit: Oh my god my entire body is itching including the skin on my ears and thanks to last summer I am so paranoid about allergic reactions and my skin is turning red in a very unflattering way what is happening to me AM I DYING.

I THINK I'M DYING.
rocknload: (MASS EFFECT ☌ a good poker face)
FUCK

Oh, and you're reading the Preferential Treatment or Discrimination Prohibition bill exactly right. Fuck. Fuck! Honestly that's the one that has me wanting to throw my laptop against the wall, because it means that affirmative action and basically anything the Republicans can spin as reverse discrimination—and check it out man, they're all fucking Republicans now—is now banned by the state constitution.

WE'RE THE FIRST STATE THEY MANAGED TO GET IT ON THE BALLOT. JUST LIKE WE WERE THE FIRST TO PASS SB-1070. THAT'S ARIZONA, PAVING THE WAY!
rocknload: (TF ☌ oh wow.)
Okay so I don't know if this is a theme just with Mandopop or with pop music in general, but okay, I just got this new song right? It is this song. It is super pretty and I have listened to it a lot.

I am not translating the whole thing and if I did it'd probably be wrong anyway, but I can totally give you the gist of it: "DON'T LEAVE ME, PLEASE DON'T LEAVE ME, LOOK I'LL EVEN SAY IT IN ENGLISH, WHY DO YOU WANT TO LEAVE ME, I AM LITERALLY BEGGING YOU NOT TO LEAVE ME AND YOU'D BETTER LISTEN TO ME OKAY, EVEN IF YOU'RE LONELY YOU'RE BETTER OFF MISERABLE WITH ME THAN HAPPY ALONE, TIMES ARE TOUGH, YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT'S GOING TO HAPPEN TO YOU OUT THERE, WOULDN'T IT SUCK TO HAVE SOMETHING TERRIBLE HAPPEN TO YOU IN THIS CRUEL WORLD AND NOT HAVE SOMEONE THERE WITH YOU? SOMEONE LIKE ME. I AM JUST PUTTING THAT OUT THERE AS A SUGGESTION. HEY KISS ME AGAIN OKAY? I LIKE YOU A LOT BTW. AND IF YOU LOVED ME YOU WOULDN'T LEAVE ME, DO YOU KNOW HOW UPSET THAT WOULD MAKE ME. WHY DO YOU WANT TO ADD MORE MISERY TO THIS MISERABLE WORLD. I AM JUST SAYING."

[livejournal.com profile] penginchan: Your music has scarier lyrics than mine
[livejournal.com profile] rocknload: what is yours
[livejournal.com profile] rocknload: is it super scary, death and blood metal
[livejournal.com profile] rocknload: about putting out eyes and burying people
[livejournal.com profile] penginchan: ACTUALLY NO
[livejournal.com profile] penginchan: Only two songs I'm listening to lately is about killing people
[livejournal.com profile] rocknload: but feilunhai is scarier than killing people
[livejournal.com profile] penginchan: Yes
[livejournal.com profile] penginchan: at least mine isn't trying to be subtle! "I WANT TO FEEL YOU ON THE BACK OF MY KNIFE."
[livejournal.com profile] rocknload: oh
[livejournal.com profile] rocknload: in that case
[livejournal.com profile] penginchan: What
rocknload: (飛輪海 ☌ 大東跟亞綸)
So my new extremely important opinion is that Aaron Yan has the prettiest eyes of any man I've ever seen.

ENTER MY WORLD )

Aaron Yan is so adorable and you might have noticed I have linked him a few times before in a very subtle way. This not my fault, he is in KO One which is my new favorite show of all time and even though he's trying to play some super stoic silent badass it barely covers up the fact that in reality he is actually too cute to even live. Anyhow me and my American friend here and blowing through that show while we make poor sleeping decisions, because it's amazing and whatever it's the weekend anyway. I am probably going to write fanfiction for this show. It is super embarrassing.

In about four hours we have to report to the school gym for some sort of international student thing, where we will totally represent our amazing and wonderful country. It's not uh, strictly mandatory, but the impression I'm getting is that it's just as good as. They even resorted to threatening us in email: "If you don't come, your national flags will be left alone in the corner of the volleyball court. >_<" They bolded it, btw, not me.

NO AMERICAN FLAG NOOOOOOOOOOO

Yeah there's no other Americans that we know of so it's gotta be us. Boo. Pics will be forthcoming if anybody who is not me actually bothers to take them.
rocknload: (SPN ☌ eye of the tiger)
Man, nothing, nothing makes me rage as irrationally as accent prejudice, man. I say irrationally because like, even though accent biases are undoubtably based on racist, classist, and xenophobic bullshit, and therefore good reason to rage, it's still probably not worth the incredible keyboard smashing fury they cause me. FYI if you ever tell me, "Oh, god, I can't stand the way Brazilians sound like when they speak English." all I fucking hear is, "Hey did you know I am a racist fuckhead I think you should RECONSIDER OUR FRIENDSHIP."

And I don't even understand most people's standards here man. I mean, like, this guy speaks bad English? And these guys? Seriously have you ever fucking talked to anybody edit: I initially intended to continue this sentence with "non-native speakers" or something and then I got distracted but I like it how it is. HAVE YOU EVER TALKED TO ANYBODY. EVER.

Oh and I love this comment: "I have to say that I have never found a FOB accent as attractive as Arrons. Actually, Arron's accent is the only asian accent I find attractive."

fjkalsfjkdaslfau9fds9

And I don't just encounter this crap over the Internet, it's like part of my daily life, and man. (Note: even though my Mandarin accent is horrendous as fuck, as far as I can tell none of this prejudice is actually directed at me, because I am white and I natively speak American English, which is possibly the most prestigious dialect of the most prestigious language on the planet right now. MY SOUTHEAST ASIAN FRIENDS THOUGH? Ugh.)

HELP ME NUKE THE WORLD


Oh related rant, it sort of bugs me when adult Mandarin learners are all, reading Chinese is so impossible, I have been studying for eight years and I have never read even one book in Chinese, it was too hard. Okay. I know that learning the hanzis is a formidable task but here's the thing, Chinese people are not born reading Chinese. OBVIOUS, I KNOW, BUT! The only reason Chinese people effortlessly read Chinese is because they have STUDIED and LEARNED and PRACTICED and read DAILY FOR ALMOST ALL OF THEIR LIFE. It's fucking stupid to admit you have never even read one book and then denounce the whole fucking character system as impossible. READ THAT BOOK. READ THE NEXT ONE! THAT ONE WILL BE EASIER goddamn. Like reading Chinese in pinyin wouldn't be a goddamn nightmare anyway.

YOU GUYS MIGHT NOT KNOW WHAT I AM TALKING ABOUT BUT TAKE MY FUCKING WORD FOR IT, THIS SHIT'S OBNOXIOUS
rocknload: (SOUTH ☌ i feel a song comin' on)
I should be asleep but [livejournal.com profile] levade and I have stumbled upon a terrible truth, and that is this: if for some strange reason you have wondered, hey, what would the world be like if Orlando Bloom was actually a Bruneian man of Taiwanese descent, don't worry, God had answered this question for you.






They look so much alike it's freaking me out. FOR COMPARISON.ALSO FOR COMPARISON. AND THIS. AND THIS.

A bunch of middle-aged Taiwanese ladies called me 汪太太 all night, which was hilarious and mildly mortifying, because we were doing K-TV and as Wang Dongcheng is a popular musician his image showed up quite a bit and whenever he did they'd go, "Oh, look, 汪太太, it's your husband~!" I am twenty-five, you might recall. Actually after hearing about me and my friend's respective ridiculous crushes on Wang Dongcheng and Wang Leehom, one of them women sighed and said that we were reminding her of how old she really was.

"Wait a second," my friend said. "What about you and--?"

And the Taiwanese lady narrowed her eyes and even switched to English to say, "My relationship with Takeshi is real."

TAIWAN, YOU KILL ME

srsly though my obsession with Taiwanese pop culture is opening up so many conversational doors
rocknload: (Default)
So tonight I need to look hot for drinking and dancing but not inappropriately so because I have an English class right beforehand and I don't want to look like I'm coming on to my studenets. LUCKY FOR YOU, AND THE POWER OF MY NOW PAID LJ ACCOUNT, YOU GET TO HELP ME PLAY THIS GAME.
[Poll #1633255]
The weird half squinting face in the second picture? That is because I am blind but trying to look cool anyway. See how it fails. WERE I TO GO WITHOUT GLASSES, I WOULD PUT MY CONTACTS IN SO I WOULDN'T HAVE THAT EXPRESSION ON, DON'T WORRY.

I AM NOT GOING OUT UNTIL LIKE, TEN OR ELEVEN IN THE MORNING YOUR TIME, FOR MOST OF YOU GUYS.

SO BASICALLY YOU HAVE PLENTY OF TIME.

edit: ugh voting in this seems weird, but i have to otherwise viewing the results is a paaaaaain BUT MY VOTE DOESN'T COUNT.
rocknload: (TREK ☌ new life and new civilizations.)
I suck at making people feel better about stuff. :/ forever.

Today I had a murderous headache basically for every moment I was awake, but I figured that if I totally ignored it it would vanish by magic, or maybe my synapses would just get bored of reporting on it, constantly, for hours, but no. When it came time to finally go to night school I figured that if I walked all the way to the class I would give myself no choice but to actually attend. BRILLIANT. Staggering over there took me about half a fucking hour, because straight lines were tough to manage, and I nearly turned back twice so I had to keep stopping to motivate myself—"加油, 蘭妮! 加油!"—plus there were the increasingly desperate attempts to find headache medicine, which finally culminated in me admitting my complete illiteracy to some random person in Watsons. I hate doing that. I think I said, like, "Er, 請問一下,我有頭疼,可以吃這個... 藥. Uh. 嗎?" That is pretty wrong, by the way. Here I am preserving its wrongness. So she read the package of the mystery pills I was waving at her, and they were just what I needed! I took some RANDOM AMOUNT I don't remember, dragged myself to the language center, then I collapsed across some picnic table on the first floor and stared off into space, because surely the meds would kick in any second.

Never happened.

Eventually my motivation to be even a merely adequate student withered and died and I went home and passed out for the next however many hours, only to wake up at two in the morning because I can't actually sleep on this horrible bed for an entire night at a time. I think I should totally get credit for going to class however. I mean for effort at least that was amazing. Pointless and amazing.

I suck at taking care of myself, but DO NOT WORRY ABOUT THIS. I've almost gotten killed by like three motorscooters and a truck in the last couple days, I'm pretty sure I already know how I'm gonna die.
rocknload: (花樣少年少女 ☌ 因為我是男生啊!)
So today I like, love Taiwan. Possibly it's because I spent like seven hours at one of the best night markets in the country today and bought a fuckton of clothes and food and stuff for like, thirty dollars, total. And I was there with friends and it was super fun and I spoke Chinese at people and didn't suck at it, and I met a Californian that owns a frozen yogurt joint there WHICH IS DELICIOUS and we chatted in American English for a bit and then I came home and found a new Taiwanese musician that I am like, completely in love with right now.

MAN I LOVE IT HERE

So to celebrate my sudden overwhelming love, have a giant picspam of Taiwanese people you should know.

these are all fabulous entertainers and amazingly talented people and a lot of them even appear to be startlingly nice and there's tons of non-shallow reasons to like and admire them--but I am not going to give you any )

plz no comments about how hot (or not) you find asians, you will kill my happy buzz

but yeah, right now my fandom is basically the entire entertainment industry of taiwan

I am sorry if you have to talk to me for like ... probably the next year, because yeah this is going to come up repeatedly

if you want to know more about any of these people, you only need to ask. you might not even need to ask tbh. you might not even want to know.
rocknload: (花樣少年少女 ☌ 因為我是男生啊!)
◈ I say "thànk yòu" roughly half the time now while speaking English. I sound like an idiot.

◈ I am picking up a Taiwanese Mandarin accent like nobody's business. I don't know if it's because I started out way behind most of my classmates in Chinese so I had a lot less time for the lovely Beijing Standard to really cement itself in place, or because I think the accent sounds pretty and friendly and my subconscious is embracing it. Or both.

◈ This probably hilariously stupid sounding American/Taiwanese accent deceives people into believing I can understand way, way more Chinese than I actually can. I guess they assume I'd have to have been here more than a month and a half before I started to crudely mimic them. I sound like an idiot.

◈ There's this tea shop I go to at least once a week even though their tea is only okay, because of the cute guy that works there. And I don't mean cute as in, you know, I'd hit that. I mean he is like fucking adorable like a puppy and he is all, ":D! :DDDD!!! Hello!!!!" whenever I go there, oh my god. Interacting with puppy!boy for one minute brightens my entire day.

◈ Which is good, because I usually see him on Thursdays and on that day I basically speak Mandarin and nothing else. At the end of it I feel like my brains are leaking out of my ears and then I dream in Mandarin. These dreams mostly suck. Everyone in them literally lacks the capability to say more than like, "Hello. Where did you buy that skirt? Do you come from America? Where are you going? Wait! No! I don't want rice with that!"

◈ Fahrenheit obsession is still going strong. I love this video, BUT I AM POSTING IT FOR LANGUAGE RELATED REASONS BELIEVE IT OR NOT. If you've heard me mention that Mandarin Chinese and Taiwanese aren't the same thing at all, and you actually care about that, you can check out the end of it at 2:40, when Jiro is basically forced to sight-translate Mandarin into Taiwanese. I'm assuming it's a sight-translation anyway, because there's no standardized way to write down Taiwanese as far as I know, and also because it looks like whatever he's doing is hurting his brain.

◈ If I find that goddamn cricket that's been shrieking for like three days fucking straight in this room somewhere, if I find it—I DON'T EVEN KNOW and it doesn't fucking matter, I will never fucking find it anyway.

◈ Long week was loooooooooooooooooong fjfdksjlfdjfls ..........

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Brittany

May 2011

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