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rocknloadRandom drabbles for Kiss Kiss Bang Bang, no real pattern or theme, seven of them. Because seven is an awesomely round number. Mostly about Harry, one Harry/Harmony... blah. Edit: Oh, and warnings for themes of child abuse. You think I'd remember to put that, huh.
01. Money
The first time Harry got arrested, he was seventeen and he’d stolen a watch of all things. An ugly watch. He’d told everyone it was a gun, because that sounded so much cooler.
Second time, it was VCRs.
Third time, it was more VCRs.
The fourth time was special, actually. Sort of. He was twenty-seven and the plan had been to boost some pretty things from a jewelry store. He’d tried to back out at the last second and he almost got shot for that.
By the fifth time he’d been arrested, VCRs were obsolete. He’d gone for DVD players.
*
02. Step
“Stay behind me,” Perry says, pulling his gun from his inside jacket pocket. If his instincts are right—and, yeah, sometimes they aren’t, but usually they are—things are about to get ugly.
But instead of obeying, Harry acts like he didn’t even hear. “What? Why?”
Perry shakes his head incredulously. “Harry. Stop arguing. Stop talking. Just do it.”
The bad guys open fire four seconds later, Harry falls down to his knees immediately and announces, “I’m bleeding.” Perry has to resist the urge to hit his partner in the face with his gun—and hit him hard—as he moves to cover him.
*
03. Skin
The first time they have sex Harry doesn’t want to ruin it—and in fact he spends a lot of time thinking about ways to not ruin it. That’s something he wouldn’t admit ever, because for one Harmony would hurt him, and anyway that’s just embarrassing.
He still manages to screw up, though, because right after the fact—and he just couldn’t help it, honest—the first thing out of his mouth is, “So, this was a biggie, right?”
Harmony responds by trying to kill him, a little bit, with her pillow. “God, Harry,” she says, “are you incapable of shutting up?”
*
04. Child
It’s so fucked up.
But when she was a little girl, really little, she had no idea why Jenna got all that attention, why Daddy loved her better. And then when she did—oh god, it is so fucked up—she wondered why her, why Jenna, did Daddy think she was prettier? Did he—
So fucking fucked up.
And she says all of that, the whole fucked up thing, to Perry one night when she’s had about eight vodka martinis and three beers. Before she passes out, she grabs Perry by the collar and says, “Please don’t tell Harry.”
He doesn’t.
*
05. Late
“I’m so sorry,” Harry is saying, over and over again, and it’s true, he is. He reaches out to put a hand on Perry’s shoulder, then he takes it back, then he decides to go for it. “Does that, um, hurt?”
“No, Harry,” Perry practically spits. And then he does spit, to get the blood out of his mouth. It doesn’t work. “I’m fine. Getting shot is something you just get used to.”
“… I’ll go call an ambulance.”
“You do that.” And it’s funny. Perry can’t bring himself to say that it’s Harry’s fault—even though that’s true. It is.
*
06. Dirt
Harry decides to visit the graves, all five of them. He doesn’t tell Perry and he doesn’t tell Harmony, because he knows what they’d say and maybe he makes them listen to him all the time and it’d only be fair—but right now, about this, he doesn’t want to hear it.
He doesn’t bring flowers, but he brings pennies. And he follows the same routine at each headstone—he places one coin on each marker and he just stands there and he looks.
Before he leaves, he tells them, “I’m sorry you’re dead, but I’m not sorry I killed you.”
*
07. Voice
It drives Perry absolutely nuts how the two of them don’t phone the police anymore. No. They call him.
First it’s Harmony, interrupting his perfectly nice dinner with a very attractive man. “Hi, Perry, here’s the thing, I think this guy’s following me home from—”
“Call the fucking cops,” Perry says. And he hangs up.
Five minutes later, it’s Harry. “Yeah, Perry, I was following Harmony home—long story, don’t ask—when I saw that this other guy was—”
“Call the fucking cops,” Perry says. And he hangs up.
He goes almost three whole minutes before he calls them back.
*
01. Money
The first time Harry got arrested, he was seventeen and he’d stolen a watch of all things. An ugly watch. He’d told everyone it was a gun, because that sounded so much cooler.
Second time, it was VCRs.
Third time, it was more VCRs.
The fourth time was special, actually. Sort of. He was twenty-seven and the plan had been to boost some pretty things from a jewelry store. He’d tried to back out at the last second and he almost got shot for that.
By the fifth time he’d been arrested, VCRs were obsolete. He’d gone for DVD players.
*
02. Step
“Stay behind me,” Perry says, pulling his gun from his inside jacket pocket. If his instincts are right—and, yeah, sometimes they aren’t, but usually they are—things are about to get ugly.
But instead of obeying, Harry acts like he didn’t even hear. “What? Why?”
Perry shakes his head incredulously. “Harry. Stop arguing. Stop talking. Just do it.”
The bad guys open fire four seconds later, Harry falls down to his knees immediately and announces, “I’m bleeding.” Perry has to resist the urge to hit his partner in the face with his gun—and hit him hard—as he moves to cover him.
*
03. Skin
The first time they have sex Harry doesn’t want to ruin it—and in fact he spends a lot of time thinking about ways to not ruin it. That’s something he wouldn’t admit ever, because for one Harmony would hurt him, and anyway that’s just embarrassing.
He still manages to screw up, though, because right after the fact—and he just couldn’t help it, honest—the first thing out of his mouth is, “So, this was a biggie, right?”
Harmony responds by trying to kill him, a little bit, with her pillow. “God, Harry,” she says, “are you incapable of shutting up?”
*
04. Child
It’s so fucked up.
But when she was a little girl, really little, she had no idea why Jenna got all that attention, why Daddy loved her better. And then when she did—oh god, it is so fucked up—she wondered why her, why Jenna, did Daddy think she was prettier? Did he—
So fucking fucked up.
And she says all of that, the whole fucked up thing, to Perry one night when she’s had about eight vodka martinis and three beers. Before she passes out, she grabs Perry by the collar and says, “Please don’t tell Harry.”
He doesn’t.
*
05. Late
“I’m so sorry,” Harry is saying, over and over again, and it’s true, he is. He reaches out to put a hand on Perry’s shoulder, then he takes it back, then he decides to go for it. “Does that, um, hurt?”
“No, Harry,” Perry practically spits. And then he does spit, to get the blood out of his mouth. It doesn’t work. “I’m fine. Getting shot is something you just get used to.”
“… I’ll go call an ambulance.”
“You do that.” And it’s funny. Perry can’t bring himself to say that it’s Harry’s fault—even though that’s true. It is.
*
06. Dirt
Harry decides to visit the graves, all five of them. He doesn’t tell Perry and he doesn’t tell Harmony, because he knows what they’d say and maybe he makes them listen to him all the time and it’d only be fair—but right now, about this, he doesn’t want to hear it.
He doesn’t bring flowers, but he brings pennies. And he follows the same routine at each headstone—he places one coin on each marker and he just stands there and he looks.
Before he leaves, he tells them, “I’m sorry you’re dead, but I’m not sorry I killed you.”
*
07. Voice
It drives Perry absolutely nuts how the two of them don’t phone the police anymore. No. They call him.
First it’s Harmony, interrupting his perfectly nice dinner with a very attractive man. “Hi, Perry, here’s the thing, I think this guy’s following me home from—”
“Call the fucking cops,” Perry says. And he hangs up.
Five minutes later, it’s Harry. “Yeah, Perry, I was following Harmony home—long story, don’t ask—when I saw that this other guy was—”
“Call the fucking cops,” Perry says. And he hangs up.
He goes almost three whole minutes before he calls them back.
*
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no subject
Date: 2008-08-27 11:03 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-08-27 11:05 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-08-27 11:06 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-08-27 11:14 pm (UTC)Harry can't do math.
Harry kills that guy. Continuation of that scene.
Harry is falsely accused.
... As you can see, uh. I like Harry.
no subject
Date: 2008-08-28 01:43 am (UTC)And of course you like Harry. He's Robert Downey Jr.
no subject
Date: 2008-08-28 04:44 am (UTC)I think I like him because I can imagine almost all of his lines coming out of Sam Witwicky's mouth.
no subject
Date: 2008-08-28 05:04 am (UTC)I subscribe to this view.
no subject
Date: 2008-08-28 05:07 am (UTC)Pfft, Sam is not dim, though. ... Harry kind of is.
I ... kind of want to cross over KKBB/Transformers just to get the two of them talking at each other, actually. I'm resisting.
no subject
Date: 2008-08-28 05:11 am (UTC)I think you need to just give in already. What good will resisting do, in the long run?
no subject
Date: 2008-08-28 05:16 am (UTC)RESISTANCE IS FUTILE? Clearly, you've been watching too much Star Trek!
no subject
Date: 2008-08-28 05:28 am (UTC)Hey, only ONE of those episodes had the Borg in it!
no subject
Date: 2008-08-28 05:35 am (UTC)... Tanz gave me a set up for the crossover anyway. NOW RESISTANCE REALLY IS FUTILE. Did you finally get through all your episodes?
no subject
Date: 2008-08-28 05:56 am (UTC)Excellent. Does Harry try to steal Sam's car? And yes, I did! They were excellent, even the one where Q tries to seduce Janeway.
no subject
Date: 2008-08-28 07:00 am (UTC)Basically, Sam is dared into shoplifting and Harry happens to be around in order to tell you YOU ARE DOING IT WRONG, KID.